Most of us think that we have learned when to lie, and when not to by the time we are no longer children. Mostly though, this isn’t true.

The lies you told when you were a child don’t count, and often will have no bearing on the lies that you will have to tell as an adult.

Mostly, men understand that there are times when you have to tell little white lies to keep your relationship running smoothly.

There is no getting away from it, there will be times when you have to lie, and this is likely to continue for the rest of your life, and providing that you understand how to do it properly, there should be no problem.

The trouble is that most men don’t really understand how best to lie. Women are much better liars than we are. Women are generally more adept at lying than men, let’s face it, it’s part of their manipulation of us.

We need to catch up, and learn how and when to lie. Not to do anything dishonest, or to cheat our partners, but to even things up, and hone the tools we have to keep our relationships running well.
When was the last time your lady ask if you think that she’s putting on weight, or if she looks fat?

Chances are that it wasn’t that long ago- yesterday? Last week, or the last time you had sex? What was your reaction? Of course you didn’t tell her that her behind would need its own zip code if it got any bigger.

If she asks you whether you like her mother, of course you aren’t going to say that you think she’s a complete battle-axe with less sense than a rabid dog. You’ll probably say something like she’s a great lady, and cooks a great meatloaf.

This will be fine, as long as she doesn’t remember that you fed the meatloaf to the dog the last time she served it to you.

If you go out with the guys to a strip joint, and throw your money around like you just won the lottery, you wouldn’t tell that to your woman.

You might say something more like you went out for a few beers with your buddies and sprang for a few rounds, or that you made sure that Tom from the office had enough cash on him to get a cab home.

As you see, these white lies are the glue that holds most relationships together. She won’t know that you hate her mother, or that you think that she has piled on the pounds since she’s been with you. Women are used to these little white lies, so when you say things like this, they aren’t taken as lies.

The trouble is that all these little white lies add up, and if you’re not careful, they can come back and bite you in the ass. Unless you’re some sort of master criminal with a mind for detail and deception, it can be hard to keep your lies straight.

You might not remember that you said that Aunt Mary made lovely Lasagne, even though it was the driest, most tasteless thing you had ever had to choke down. This is fine, until the next time you see her, and she makes “your favorite” again, and you mention to your lady that you don’t like it.


Firstly, you need to keep your lies simple, and make sure that they’re small enough to be memorable. Keep it short and sweet like you think Mom’s a nice lady, you don’t think that your partner is getting fat, simple things like this should minimize the risk of tripping yourself up.

You could, however, use another method. This one is easier, less likely to catch up with you, and is even less devious than a little white lie. Stay Neutral. Don’t lie, but tell the aspects of the truth that are safe and positive.

If you visit a friend who has the dog from hell, instead of telling them that you love dogs, and wish that you had one, say that it has lovely fur or seems very loyal. If you’re at the mother-in-laws for dinner, don’t try and tell her that everything in the meal is your favorite, tell her that the beans are great.

If you use this method, you are not even lying, you’re covering your ass, and you don’t have to remember the things that you have said to make her feel good. Try it this way, and she won’t even have an excuse to refuse you sex. You know what they’re like if they catch you out with a lie, the sex is always the first thing to go.


In a perfect world, no-one would have to lie. Ideally, your woman would never get fat, you wouldn’t have to eat anything your mother-in-law cooks, and no-one would ask you stupid questions like “ does my bum look good in this?”


Unfortunately, this isn’t the ideal world, and these things will keep coming up. Next time it happens though, try using this technique. Don’t come up with some lie to cover yourself, try approaching the issue differently, and tell part of the truth instead. It should save you loads of trouble, and keep your relationship going smoothly too.